You may be reading this entry later than usual, and I'm grateful. Hope you're enjoying your Friday as much as I'm glad that it actually is Friday. But God saw me to my keyboard later than usual; oh His timing.
Long story short, I happened to be in a meeting today - one that had you and I not been praying and talking about meekness this week - could and would have gone entirely differently. I probably would have thought and said things unbecoming our week's topic. Not that I was dishonest in the end, but when grace takes over your mouth, it's easier for meek to speak. During a point of the call where the hair on the back of my neck seemed to be doing the jitterbug, the words from an earlier entry came to mind:
"Oh, so you have been overlooked? They have placed someone else before you? They have whispered that you are pretty small stuff after all? And now you feel hurt because the world is saying about you the very things you have been saying about yourself? Only yesterday you were telling God that you were nothing, a mere worm of the dust. Where is your consistency? Come on, humble yourself, and cease to care what men think."
Where IS my consistency? The sins of jealousy and envy are never too far from the surface of my skin. Those sins truly prevent me (and all of us) from enjoying what others have; especially if you think that somehow you deserve something that was clearly not God's will for you. Let that reach you for a second. So after all my reading and studying the subject of being meek, I'm certain I'm not. But aren't we glad that God knows all about it?
So, whether it's about our health, our family, our friends, and careers, meekness I believe is a daily dependence - something far beyond my reach alone - and I fail too often each day for a victory lap, even during moments when I think I got it licked by holding my tongue . In Heaven, meekness will come naturally through Christ. And to think, someday in Heaven, we'll naturally extend grace to those that God calls us to show meekness to on earth; this is me, trying to start early.
With that thought, I'd love to let Tozer lead us in prayer as we close a pretty tough week for me, and maybe for some of you too.
Lord, make me childlike. Deliver me from the urge to compete with one another for place or prestige or position. I would be simple and artless as a little child. Deliver me from pose or pretense. Forgive me for thinking of myself. Help me to forget myself and find my true peace in beholding Thee. That Thou may answer this prayer I humble myself before Thee. Lay upon me Thy easy yoke of self-forgetfulness that through it I may find rest. Amen.
Love you guys. Thanks for reading.